Sure, attempting to jump a civic through a yacht dangerous, but attempting to jump a civic through a yacht without my State Farm agent? Now THAT’S crazy!
Linda had worked for years to perfect her hovering automobile device, but unfortunately the venture capital money ran out just before she could develop a reliable landing system.
And that wraps it up for this episode of “Not Without my Mineral Water Bottle.” Join us next week when Clara risks her life in pursuit of the Zephyrhills Fountain of Youth.
The difference between a ship and a boat is that you can put a boat on a ship, you can’t put a ship on a boat. So what’s the difference between a car and a boat?
“ugh how pathetic this yacht doesnt have one of those little bridges that i may walk along. humph! i will make my own and still have time to drink my evian.
April 4th, 2002 at 8:05 am
“The boat jumped out in front of me,” she later claimed on the insurance form.
April 4th, 2002 at 2:58 am
Sure, attempting to jump a civic through a yacht dangerous, but attempting to jump a civic through a yacht without my State Farm agent? Now THAT’S crazy!
April 4th, 2002 at 9:32 pm
and THAT, my son, is why men pay more for auto insurance than women… they can parallel park in the tightest of spaces.
April 4th, 2002 at 11:17 am
“A perfect example of driver carelessness. With the door left wide open like that someone’s bound to steal it.”
April 4th, 2002 at 1:59 pm
No, it can swim… It’s just nervous.
April 5th, 2002 at 6:25 pm
Bad car, BAD CAR!
April 5th, 2002 at 7:59 pm
Soon after this incident, the Great Lakes Blind Peoples’ Yachting Association was closed down.
May 21st, 2002 at 11:05 pm
“See the real challenge wasn’t balancing the car on to boat and wall it was balancing my fat ass on that little rope”
April 4th, 2002 at 10:40 pm
“Well, it might not be an airplane through a large building, but my act of terrorism is done.”
April 8th, 2002 at 9:03 pm
Solving the riddle “why does cargo go by ship and a shipment go by car”
April 4th, 2002 at 2:22 pm
I don’t care, I’m rich you see…
April 4th, 2002 at 6:28 pm
Satan’s wife smiles contently as she inspects her latest accomplishment.
April 17th, 2002 at 9:54 pm
Debbie never really knew what to do with herself, after getting kicked off the swimming team…
April 8th, 2002 at 9:29 am
How’s my driving? Call 1-800-2-ADVISE
April 8th, 2002 at 2:15 pm
Hey! You scratched my anchor!
June 20th, 2002 at 12:28 am
Youu saw my blinker, bitch.
April 4th, 2002 at 3:13 am
oh divorces are a pain…okay, okay, so you can have both the car and the boat. Here they are honey! All yours.
April 4th, 2002 at 3:30 am
Linda had worked for years to perfect her hovering automobile device, but unfortunately the venture capital money ran out just before she could develop a reliable landing system.
April 4th, 2002 at 8:13 pm
you mean I SHOULDN’T mix acid with Nyquil? Man, there goes my weekly races with the blue and purple teddybears!!!!
June 23rd, 2006 at 10:00 am
“If you don’t like my driving, stay the hell out of the river”!
April 4th, 2002 at 8:59 am
Uhmmm, Ok….Is there, like, going to be a fine for this or something? ‘Cause ya’know I’m sooo to busy for something like that.
April 4th, 2002 at 5:28 pm
“Well, color me embarrassed. I thought the guy on the boat was waving frantically because he wanted me to come closer!”
April 5th, 2002 at 3:20 pm
Defensive Driving
April 6th, 2002 at 2:36 am
Next time, you may want to just use the tire if you don’t want the boat to bump the dock.
April 6th, 2002 at 6:03 am
Dude! There’s my car!
April 16th, 2002 at 10:18 pm
But it worked in all those action movies…
April 4th, 2002 at 12:16 am
I knew I left my car around here somewhere.
April 4th, 2002 at 5:45 pm
Ooops, wrong boat. I thought this is one of those car ferries. How silly of me.
April 4th, 2002 at 6:12 pm
the model was simply trying to match the car pose to her own.
wrinkled up and sagging in the front
April 4th, 2002 at 8:37 pm
What was the warning on the cold medicine again?
April 5th, 2002 at 1:40 pm
One reason automatic starters aren’t a good idea for manual transmissions.
April 5th, 2002 at 4:34 pm
Yeah…I’ll take a fish sandwich combo with a sprite….What do you mean this isn’t the drive through at Captain D’s….
April 5th, 2002 at 5:08 pm
I’ll teach that damn bastard for divorcing me!
April 5th, 2002 at 10:11 pm
tonight on FOX…the truth behind
Springtime when frisky cars mate
April 5th, 2002 at 11:46 pm
woman pushes car into boat with right breast
April 8th, 2002 at 4:13 pm
The bad news is….
That man with her wasn’t her husband
The good news is….
Her lover is also her Insurance agent!
April 9th, 2002 at 5:56 am
Look what that boat did to my car!
April 9th, 2002 at 7:13 am
I just wanted to go to the carwash!!
April 9th, 2002 at 9:25 am
shit happens
April 9th, 2002 at 11:20 am
And that wraps it up for this episode of “Not Without my Mineral Water Bottle.” Join us next week when Clara risks her life in pursuit of the Zephyrhills Fountain of Youth.
April 9th, 2002 at 12:16 pm
water = clear. vodka = clear. Connection, perhaps?
April 9th, 2002 at 5:12 pm
Jane ponders attempt #143 to break into the stuntman business.
April 11th, 2002 at 12:00 am
From the people who brought you The Club…
April 11th, 2002 at 3:33 am
‘Now where did that boat come from?’
April 11th, 2002 at 5:44 pm
See honey, I knew we should’ve upgraded to the model with the running boards.
April 12th, 2002 at 9:01 pm
Closer honey. Straighten out the wheel. Keep coming. Keep coming. WHOAH!!!
April 14th, 2002 at 8:45 am
Okay honey, we’re here! Let’s go… *splash*
April 17th, 2002 at 7:22 pm
Losing a round of maritime chicken: Mary Anne was certain the yacht would veer away at the last minute …
April 19th, 2002 at 4:28 pm
The difference between a ship and a boat is that you can put a boat on a ship, you can’t put a ship on a boat. So what’s the difference between a car and a boat?
May 8th, 2002 at 2:18 pm
why it’s worth it to tip the valet
May 21st, 2002 at 2:44 pm
Conduite ‡ gauche, conduite gauche.
June 4th, 2002 at 3:07 pm
So did I get the part? Am I the next Ms. 007?
February 25th, 2003 at 3:58 am
A Good Woman Driver
April 4th, 2002 at 2:39 am
Man! They din roll down the windows!!
April 3rd, 2002 at 11:57 pm
Ohhhh i get it . . .I’m a woman driver. I shouldn’t be driving close to water, supermarkets, or schools.
April 4th, 2002 at 12:08 am
i swear officer… i wont do it again!
April 4th, 2002 at 12:31 am
all a board!
April 4th, 2002 at 12:52 am
Yet another reason why idiocy should be a federal crime punishable by death.
April 4th, 2002 at 1:33 am
The new Ford Aspire, for those who aspire to be between a rock and a . . . yacht.
April 4th, 2002 at 1:41 am
When Jesus is driving on water, he just parks it wherever, and let’s his Daddy take care of any fines.
April 4th, 2002 at 1:56 am
You too can look this good and drive as well!
April 4th, 2002 at 3:57 am
Now who says I can’t park my car AGAIN, can just talk to the owner of this yacht.
April 4th, 2002 at 9:31 am
LOOK AT ME! I’m a silly bastard
April 4th, 2002 at 9:41 am
err…PMT?
April 4th, 2002 at 10:41 am
Its an ad for the new Honda Plank!
April 4th, 2002 at 12:29 pm
God damn boat, came out of nowhere.
April 4th, 2002 at 2:09 pm
people on ‘ludes should not drive!
April 4th, 2002 at 5:34 pm
“ugh how pathetic this yacht doesnt have one of those little bridges that i may walk along. humph! i will make my own and still have time to drink my evian.
April 4th, 2002 at 6:09 pm
Uh..It’s a funny story , officer. You see, i was drinking a whole lot of alcohol last night…
April 4th, 2002 at 9:29 pm
Oh, honey. Lets get a picture in front of this boat. The girls at home will never believe the crazy things they do for parking out here.
April 4th, 2002 at 10:24 pm
Wonder how they got that boat docked under that car?
April 4th, 2002 at 10:36 pm
Now kids, don’t try this at home…..because it’s REALLY REALLY DUMB.
April 5th, 2002 at 12:08 am
damn.
April 5th, 2002 at 1:25 am
awww honey, i’ve always wanted a front porch.
April 5th, 2002 at 2:12 am
Bugger, I’ve left the door open!
April 5th, 2002 at 2:14 am
Stephanie spent every waking moment thinking up new challenges for the Ferrari pit crew.
April 5th, 2002 at 4:25 am
And to think we gave them the vote!
April 5th, 2002 at 6:09 am
No, I’m not Mary. I’m Dom in Disguise. Smile! You’re on America’s most stupid overweight women drivers with fake blond hair!
April 5th, 2002 at 10:59 am
holy shitttt !!
Who took this pic ?? it’s me !!!
April 5th, 2002 at 1:43 pm
Look dear, the boat ‘birthed’ a car
April 5th, 2002 at 2:21 pm
and next week we learn to parellel park…
April 5th, 2002 at 2:59 pm
…I swear officer that this is a just a harmless little bottle water…
April 5th, 2002 at 3:34 pm
Terrorism
April 5th, 2002 at 3:53 pm
car: $16,000
boat: $30,000
having a good shot for captionmachine.com: priceless
April 6th, 2002 at 1:51 am
Why the surprise?? There was a woman in the wheel.
April 6th, 2002 at 6:10 am
Look, the captain told me the gangplank would hold the weight of a car so it’s not my fault
April 6th, 2002 at 6:42 pm
One of the key concepts of driving is knowing if you are in “D” or “R” BEFORE you peel out of your parking space.
April 6th, 2002 at 7:10 pm
A boat… several thousand
A woman… even more costly
A jump rope… buck fifty
Watching Herbie join in on the fun… PRICELESS
April 6th, 2002 at 9:50 pm
Father to Son :
“And to think, back in the old days they used to use Champagne!!”
April 7th, 2002 at 12:29 pm
Now where the hell did I put the keys??
April 7th, 2002 at 1:27 pm
so your saying this is a bad thing?
April 7th, 2002 at 2:54 pm
The most expensive gangplank ever.
April 7th, 2002 at 8:01 pm
The good news? The car and boat’s color match
April 8th, 2002 at 12:58 am
Yet another New Yorker gets creative in the search for the elusive parking space.
April 8th, 2002 at 2:59 am
Aquatic transportation is for pussies…
April 8th, 2002 at 6:55 am
Damn !! My wife told me her car was stolen… Lying bitch !!
April 8th, 2002 at 8:49 am
It could be that women can drive a car, but i won’t let this bitch drive mine!
April 8th, 2002 at 11:57 am
The part of Titanic you never saw…..
April 8th, 2002 at 2:30 pm
Olga Wyzostyzxyk proudly shows off her new Polish life boat.
April 8th, 2002 at 6:22 pm
Oh Yes Folks, Honda Civics can do it all.
April 8th, 2002 at 7:07 pm
look what I’ve just done…..and I’m smiling like a cunt because I’m proud of it…
April 8th, 2002 at 7:08 pm
WOMEN……KNOW YOUR LIMITS!!!!
April 8th, 2002 at 8:26 pm
Cashing out at the insurance fraud line.
April 8th, 2002 at 9:39 pm
And people wonder why insurance is so expensive.
April 9th, 2002 at 4:51 am
“…that’s right officer….we then found the driver passed out under a microsoft sign…”
April 9th, 2002 at 5:53 am
This ain’t good.
April 9th, 2002 at 5:54 am
…and so the heroic woman was able to stop the terrorists escaping on this pleasure boat.
April 9th, 2002 at 9:03 am
CHEESE!
April 9th, 2002 at 10:50 am
doesn’t anybody wonder how she got out of the car and on to the shore?
April 9th, 2002 at 2:05 pm
“WHAT THE HELL!!!”, Hank Hill.
April 9th, 2002 at 3:12 pm
Just having my period…
April 9th, 2002 at 5:24 pm
Happy Birthday Osama, lots of love from the whole family here in sunny california! Hope you like your card’
Love, Jody
April 10th, 2002 at 7:38 am
NOW where am I gonna bury the body?
April 10th, 2002 at 1:18 pm
I think I’ll untie the boat…
April 10th, 2002 at 3:12 pm
Dang! Somebody been messin’ with the cruise control?
April 11th, 2002 at 12:41 am
Who said women can’t park cars. Try this for a change!
April 11th, 2002 at 10:27 am
the car: “Aaaah! Get this dock out of my ass!”
the boat: “Aaaah! Get this car out of my ass!”
April 11th, 2002 at 11:44 pm
More proof that women cant drive….
April 15th, 2002 at 11:14 am
Honda admits airbags don’t work when hovering over water.
April 15th, 2002 at 7:37 pm
Someone’s been playing too much Crazy Taxi.
April 16th, 2002 at 11:30 am
Hey man … If Herbie can have a will of its own, why can’t my Honda?
April 16th, 2002 at 7:29 pm
Mr. Magoo goes to Florida.
April 17th, 2002 at 5:40 pm
“Bond, Jane Bond”
April 17th, 2002 at 7:57 pm
How else can I check if their colors match?
April 18th, 2002 at 5:25 pm
Why yes officer, I am a natural blonde… How did you know?
April 19th, 2002 at 4:30 pm
You can stop smiling now
April 19th, 2002 at 7:50 pm
Next time let the man drive
April 19th, 2002 at 7:51 pm
I wonder did she have a New Hampshire License?
April 22nd, 2002 at 6:25 am
“Did I do that” -Erkel
April 27th, 2002 at 10:14 am
“3 hour tour, my ass!”
April 30th, 2002 at 11:38 am
I hope I dont get a ticket.
May 2nd, 2002 at 12:33 am
your insurance does NOT cover acts of supreme stupidity
May 3rd, 2002 at 12:06 am
Helen Keller raod trip.
May 9th, 2002 at 5:40 am
i saw it on a cartoon once and it looked pretty easy…
May 17th, 2002 at 10:53 pm
sometimes i get so frustrated trying to drive into a canal and drown myself when this shit happens
May 18th, 2002 at 7:36 pm
So you mean to tell me that that lever is actually a parking brake?
December 7th, 2004 at 8:18 am
i bet you thought i was stupid enough to step out my door after i hit!
June 3rd, 2002 at 11:14 pm
Well, at least she didn’t try to jump the shark. (If anyone gets this reference, I’ll be amazed)
June 4th, 2002 at 4:51 pm
honey, which one is the brake again??
June 4th, 2002 at 5:56 pm
Not again!
June 9th, 2002 at 3:53 pm
Damn women drivers!!!
June 9th, 2002 at 10:27 pm
I have PMS and a gun! Any questions?
July 10th, 2002 at 7:27 pm
Accidents can happen anywhere….GIECO Look for the talking Gekko
July 15th, 2002 at 8:34 am
Why do they let women drive?
July 26th, 2002 at 11:29 pm
Yes buffy, I got rid of those gotty rubber bumpers and installed four new Kia Sophias, they do have a 10 year warranty…
September 20th, 2002 at 7:09 am
Oh my God,u turd!U didnt pull the handbreak!
March 6th, 2003 at 3:44 pm
another woman!!!
March 18th, 2003 at 8:32 pm
See why blondes shudint drive
June 3rd, 2003 at 7:35 am
oke it was the b clas but
June 8th, 2003 at 3:46 pm
The sad thing of this picture is….she even looks proud!
September 19th, 2003 at 4:53 pm
Valet Parking School for the Blind.
March 23rd, 2006 at 9:38 pm
No! The other pedal!!!!
April 4th, 2002 at 1:36 am
women drivers.. enuf said.
April 5th, 2002 at 2:42 am
I’m just too hungry for cock!
April 5th, 2002 at 2:57 am
Yes, I am a woman driver!!!
April 8th, 2002 at 8:10 pm
Not again!
April 5th, 2002 at 12:00 am
This is a car that’s barely hanging on between the dock and a boat.