In other news, the Air Force’s 40 billion dollar Stealth Forklift program was scrapped this week following reports that its revolutionary design became unstable at low speeds.
Due to a rupture in the space-time continuum, the driver of this forklift turned into a small flea, leaving the warhead to its demise at the hands of concrete.
They decided to ban television, so we watched more,they wear more clothes, so we wear less, they drop some planes into the twin towers, so we drove a forklift with a missile attatched to it unsucsessfully to them…..
Pictured above, the Pentagon’s latest development: The self propelled bomb-catcher. The forklift like device actually catches incoming ordinance and lays them gently to the ground, thus avoiding detonation.
(Pilot to Co-Pilot)Ok I’m gonna drop it here, it’ll hit that sign there, fly over to the building, bounce off of that bird sitting in there and land in the forklift, nothing but net.
Omar Mohammed Jihad triumphantly managed to steal a bomb from an Air Force base to use in a terrorist attack, only to learn the hard way that driving a forklift isn’t as easy as it looks.
July 29th, 2002 at 11:02 am | Promoted
Darryl final understood why the Air Force had rejected his application for Flight School based on his less than perfect vision.
July 29th, 2002 at 11:22 am | Promoted
Don’y ya just hate it when that happens?
July 29th, 2002 at 11:37 am | Promoted
Today on America’s Funniest Military Industrial Complex Home Videos…
July 29th, 2002 at 12:53 pm | Promoted
Be All You Can Be
July 29th, 2002 at 1:03 pm | Promoted
In other news, the Air Force’s 40 billion dollar Stealth Forklift program was scrapped this week following reports that its revolutionary design became unstable at low speeds.
July 29th, 2002 at 1:08 pm
“I don’t care what you’re doing,” said the warehouse manager. “Drop what you’re doing and get in here now!”
July 29th, 2002 at 1:48 pm | Promoted
OK John, back ‘er up a little more. Just a little more. What are you talking about, you got tons of room!
July 29th, 2002 at 2:03 pm | Promoted
The age old question… “Which drops first, The Military Bomb(in the fork-lift), or the doody-bomb(in the fork-lift operator’s pants)?
July 29th, 2002 at 2:08 pm | Promoted
And we wonder how it is possible for foreign terrorists to train at US Flight schools, hijack us air liners and destroy the Twin Towers….
July 29th, 2002 at 2:09 pm | Promoted
Your tax dollars hard at work.
July 29th, 2002 at 2:17 pm | Promoted
Cruise control doesn’t STEER the vehicle, moron!
July 29th, 2002 at 2:21 pm | Promoted
After he was fired by the airline for landing his plane on the beach, Billy Bob got a wherehouse job at a military base.
July 29th, 2002 at 2:28 pm | Promoted
A rare behind-the-scenes look at President Bush’s “Missile Defense Shield” program.
July 29th, 2002 at 3:01 pm | Promoted
The invisible man would try anything to steal military supplies from the waepons depot.
July 29th, 2002 at 3:48 pm | Promoted
“Boy, Bob sure came running around that corner fast! What’s your hurry, Bob? Bob?!”
July 29th, 2002 at 3:50 pm | Promoted
Whistle Blowing “It’s Miller Time!”
July 29th, 2002 at 4:02 pm | Promoted
o.k., who’s the smartass bastard who moved the truck ?
July 29th, 2002 at 4:05 pm | Promoted
Moments earlier this parking lot had been teeming with Canadians and Afghan wedding guests.
July 29th, 2002 at 4:23 pm | Promoted
Due to a rupture in the space-time continuum, the driver of this forklift turned into a small flea, leaving the warhead to its demise at the hands of concrete.
July 29th, 2002 at 4:50 pm | Promoted
This is what happens when too many women get in the military
July 29th, 2002 at 6:46 pm | Promoted
You mean forklifts AIN’T four wheel drive all terrain vehicles?!
Well damn… Now you tell me…
July 29th, 2002 at 7:27 pm | Promoted
Firecrackers get bigger every year.
July 29th, 2002 at 7:59 pm | Promoted
Oh screw it. Let Anna Nicole Smith pick up her own dildoe.
July 29th, 2002 at 8:53 pm | Promoted
Warning: This medication may cause drowsiness. Do not operate heavy machinery and/or nuclear warheads.
July 30th, 2002 at 12:03 am | Promoted
Scud missile launch platform.
July 30th, 2002 at 1:08 am | Promoted
Equity in the Defence Forces
Red Teaming is introduced to 3AR Logistics Squadron
July 30th, 2002 at 2:10 am
Marlon Brando’s prescription suppositories arrived a little later than usual
July 30th, 2002 at 2:29 am | Promoted
That’s a pathetic fence for a military complex!
July 30th, 2002 at 2:33 am | Promoted
Sorry for dropping the mini-submarine guys
July 30th, 2002 at 6:28 am | Promoted
Why Suicide Bombers prefer TNT…
July 30th, 2002 at 9:44 am | Promoted
I told you to turn right!!!
July 30th, 2002 at 9:50 am | Promoted
Before Johnny could deliver the bomb, some terrorists had hijacked the plane and were heading for the Pentagon.
July 30th, 2002 at 9:57 am
“April’s Fool!!!”, yelled Anthony, seconds before he died.
July 30th, 2002 at 10:02 am | Promoted
After this fifth unsuccesful attempt, Jimmy gave up trying to commit suicide.
July 30th, 2002 at 12:43 pm | Promoted
The real reason Rosie O’Donnell quit her show is they always had trouble delivering her burritos.
July 30th, 2002 at 1:16 pm
All you need now are your batteries honey:)
July 30th, 2002 at 8:10 pm
Everyone knew it would be trouble when Tony Hawk started tricking on the Quonset hut.
July 30th, 2002 at 8:11 pm
Get away from her, you BITCH!
July 31st, 2002 at 2:04 am | Promoted
They decided to ban television, so we watched more,they wear more clothes, so we wear less, they drop some planes into the twin towers, so we drove a forklift with a missile attatched to it unsucsessfully to them…..
July 31st, 2002 at 2:07 am
OH MY GOD JIM!!!! see that Forklift thats driving up the wall with a BOMB attatched to it…..theres a dollar next to it!!!
July 31st, 2002 at 9:30 am | Promoted
It was at this point they worked out that letting the blindman drive the forklift wasn’t such a great idea.
July 31st, 2002 at 12:55 pm | Promoted
An Army of one . . . stupid son of a bitch
July 31st, 2002 at 1:51 pm | Promoted
Pictured above, the Pentagon’s latest development: The self propelled bomb-catcher. The forklift like device actually catches incoming ordinance and lays them gently to the ground, thus avoiding detonation.
August 1st, 2002 at 7:49 am
jeeeezz….... it sure wiggles around more when it has the batteries are intalled eh ??????
August 2nd, 2002 at 1:11 am
Who let the woman drive?
August 2nd, 2002 at 1:24 am | Promoted
Another short career for Tennessee Tuxedo.
August 2nd, 2002 at 2:54 am | Promoted
fighter jet designer to general : ” So let me get this straight, you want me to mount THAT on the wings of your F-16??”
August 2nd, 2002 at 10:57 am
Q.According to the ‘NUCLEAR WARHEAD HANDLER’S GUIDE’,what word is banned from a Handler’s vocabulary? A.OOPS.
August 2nd, 2002 at 8:40 pm | Promoted
Funny, I didn’t know there were Missle Napalms on the back of a Home Depot? Makes you wonder why the business has been around for 23 years hasn’t it?
August 4th, 2002 at 10:30 am
They told me it would fly!
August 4th, 2002 at 2:01 pm
the last remnants of Home Depot’s short-lived “thermonuclear warhead” home delivery service.
August 4th, 2002 at 2:05 pm | Promoted
Jeremy the forklift driver left work early because the sheer size of the thermonuclear device made him feel sexually inadequate.
August 5th, 2002 at 9:13 am | Promoted
The forklift is actually level. It’s the rest of the world that’s wrong.
August 5th, 2002 at 5:14 pm | Promoted
operator: what happen
captain: sombody set up us the bomb !!
August 6th, 2002 at 4:34 pm | Promoted
(Pilot to Co-Pilot)Ok I’m gonna drop it here, it’ll hit that sign there, fly over to the building, bounce off of that bird sitting in there and land in the forklift, nothing but net.
August 9th, 2002 at 5:53 am | Promoted
OK guys its 17:00 hrs, lets clean this baby up in the morning.
August 11th, 2002 at 6:47 pm
Omar Mohammed Jihad triumphantly managed to steal a bomb from an Air Force base to use in a terrorist attack, only to learn the hard way that driving a forklift isn’t as easy as it looks.
August 13th, 2002 at 5:51 am | Promoted
Osama’s ne plan: Destroy America by way of the all-new INVISIBLE ISLAM!!
August 13th, 2002 at 6:35 pm | Promoted
Dammit! Who stole my Norden bombsight??!!
September 17th, 2002 at 3:12 pm | Promoted
Had To Do It Your Own Way
September 17th, 2002 at 3:13 pm | Promoted
A Terror Plan
September 18th, 2002 at 12:00 pm | Promoted
“Guess i should’ve taken the ramp…”
September 23rd, 2002 at 12:49 pm | Promoted
A new way of terrorism
September 30th, 2002 at 8:35 pm | Promoted
When drunks drive the fork lift on casual Saturdays
October 10th, 2002 at 11:54 pm | Promoted
Oh, thats why the West coast Long Shoreman didn’t want to work.
March 18th, 2003 at 4:58 pm | Promoted
When cargo’s had enough of being pushed around.
March 21st, 2003 at 11:57 am | Promoted
America need not fear or concern yourself over terrorism, for you neighbors suffer stupidicism
April 16th, 2003 at 7:40 pm | Promoted
Resourceful Iraqis try to catch US dropped bombs
January 8th, 2004 at 11:21 am | Promoted
mr. bush, we have a little problem…
not now jef
sir, it’s very important..
ok, what’s the problem jef?
the caterpilar doesn’t drive like before….
October 20th, 2004 at 8:59 am | Promoted
The spider-forklift demonstrates it`s effectiveness by reversing into the warehouse.
October 30th, 2004 at 10:19 am | Promoted
whod of thought a bomb would make this little crane top heavy
October 30th, 2004 at 10:19 am | Promoted
whod of thought this bomb would make the forklift top heavy
August 26th, 2006 at 1:51 am
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August 26th, 2006 at 6:16 pm
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August 27th, 2006 at 9:19 am
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March 2nd, 2008 at 6:48 am
Are New Multi Million Anti Terrorist Theft Device: THE REVERSE POLARITY FORKLIFT!