Top Gun


It’s all fun and games until someone gets there eye poked out with an F-16.

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117 Captions for “Top Gun”

  1. Jeff Patridge

    “The fatal last flight of Bozo the Pilot.”

  2. julia

    Dude check out that girl down there. Let’s fly in and get a closer look.

  3. Veshka

    Geeze Bob, that is a mighty nice statue of a fighter plane, but how does it stay upright?

  4. steve just

    your tax dollars at work. God I love this country.

  5. Anonymous

    Keep holding it . . . I’ve Just gotta open the door a liiitle wider

  6. Anonymous

    “I believe I can fly!” – Bob Pilot

  7. spat

    General: “OK, he will do. Now tell him to find the nearest mosque.”

  8. AliasMoze

    “You call that a landing?”

  9. (pdw)

    Put the plane down and stop showing off, Superman!

  10. hero

    Fine fine, we’ll call you ‘Maverick’! Just don’t kill us!!!

  11. Steve 1

    The new ‘compact storage’ F-23 is Mr Bush’s brainwave for reducing the cost of war – you can fit 50 of them on the deck of a single aircraft carrier. Everyone agrees it’s a wonderful idea.

  12. TheJester

    Pete knew his sculpture would impress the most stubborn of critics at the international art exhibition

  13. steve just

    In an effort to make the Military more efficient, the Navy contracted with McDonald’s to provide drive-thrus on select Aircraft carriers. Don’t spill the coffee.

  14. Big M

    Damn, missed the boat…er…I’ll swim I guess

  15. Alex Kaseberg

    “That’s very funny Sir, but you know that’s not what we meant when we asked you to parallel park that air craft.”

  16. Qs23

    You’re Right! This IS the easiest way to get the change that’s fallen under the seat.

  17. KiwiBird

    Double Sided Tape. Works perfectly.

  18. Gram

    Get out of my way, I see an Amtrack Train coming!

  19. Anonymous

    “Sorry about that, control, I just had to sneeze. Did I miss anythi… JESUS CHRIST!”

  20. Anonymous

    Pilots found the new sculpture distracting.

  21. lilburro

    To the delight of his fellow sailors, Capt. Collins proves that an egg is not the only thing you can balance during the Vernal Equinox.

  22. tatroyer

    Iceman took the bet that he could get the plane to turn on a dime.

  23. Slayer

    “Right Turn, Clyde”

  24. 9Nails

    When you’re 2,000 miles away from home, entertainment comes at the cost of $21,000,000 for an F-14 Tomcat.

  25. tortured soul

    Bam Bam joins the air force.

  26. Maxx

    That’s not a boomerang. THIS is a boomerang!

  27. Kilroy

    That’s one hell of a parallel parking job, private!

  28. Roadcrew

    In order to save deck space, the aircraft carrier’s captain required all pilots to parallel park their jets.

  29. AARON

    For the one million dollar qestion
    Who was hit by the f-11
    a)Bin laden b) uncle sam
    c)lollie pop guy d) some dickhead

  30. Danelle

    You better get out on this side, Bill.

  31. Danelle

    You better get out on this side, Bill.

  32. JosÈ Luis

    Let¥s buzz the tower!

  33. virtuoso guitarist

    Jake had survived the somewhat dubious task of flying a mission through the Burmuda Triangle, but somehow things just weren’t the same afterwards.

  34. The Beaver

    TAG!!!….YOUR’E IT!!!

  35. emale

    Mohamed Atah couldn’t fly it better !!

  36. Karl Marx

    …but you should see when Capt. Miller juggles THREE of those things….

  37. Kael Lorenz

    Well it’s hard to fly a plane when you’re sucking on a bottle,
    ‘Specially when the plane’s an experimental model,
    Reach for Jim Beam, and you pull on the throttle!!!
    Thank god I’m a country boy!!!

  38. Anonymous

    Let me get this strait.. 45% of my taxes go to the military?

  39. Terry

    The decks new Weathervane not only told the direction of the wind, but was considered a work of art by many of the flight crew.

  40. Anonymous


  41. Babylon

    Those crazy americans slay me

  42. det

    Are you sure we should have rented this thing from Hertz? Not exactly.

  43. mortius

    Plane to tower: What do you mean control-alt-delete should fix the problem?

    It was at that point the US airforce worked out that Microsoft really does suck.

  44. zatterat

    How in the hell did he get it to balance on the wing like that?

  45. Sean

    The hook will catch the wire.

  46. Anonymous

    Driven by the fact that skateboarding had lost it’s thrill and those recruiting commercials that feature that kickass song by Godsmack, Captain Tony Hawk decided to try his luck as a naval aviator.

  47. Raw knuckels

    Mind ye head, lads.

  48. JoshEP

    Once again we relize the dangers of flying sideways.

  49. dale

    To hell with the mile high club, darlin.. you’re now in the 10 foot off the flight deck club!

  50. ChuckA

    No, I am not a pilot but I did sleep at a Holiday Inn last night…..

  51. Anonymous

    Look’n good Topper. Call the ball.

  52. Anonymous

    You don’t mind if I just drop in?

  53. Anonymous

    What do you mean “No Air Force pukes”?

  54. gavhole

    Man, I picked a bad week to stop sniffing glue…

  55. seagun

    C’mon guys look closer. I swear there’s something stuck on my wing.
    Are you blind? I can feel it. Look again.

  56. captain captian

    the armys new system of storing planes verticlly never really caught on
    they don’t know why but the poeple kept walking into the planes in aw

  57. Ant

    Too close for missles, switch’n to guns

  58. b

    Ed followed through on his claim and slapped James with the wing. At which point he fled like crazy!

  59. badlybred

    STOP!!! Nobody breathe!!

  60. Anonymous

    Your OTHER left

  61. Anonymous

    Are you looking at ME?
    Well are ya?

  62. Sim

    I know that CD is in here somewhe…S H I T ! !

  63. john

    Only a select few afhganistanny reporters were allowed to photograph thier countries new “statue of liberty” before it was opened to the public. Compliments of the USA.

  64. john

    Captain Joe Smith always enjoyed flying low enough to “flip off” the Taliban members before he circled around and bombed them.

  65. miles043

    Diamond in the back, sunroof top, diggin’ the scene with a gangsta’ lean uuh, uuh, uuh…

  66. Check out the Caption Machine..great

    isn’t this site interesting

  67. Check out the Caption Machine..great

    great site

  68. jim

    dam rookies

  69. Lui

    tower to plane: “It’s that you honey?”

  70. Jose Romero


  71. yannibear

    Left wing: His luggage.
    Right wing: Her luggage.

  72. mikemenn

    Newest Navy Planes Able Do Difficult Wingstand Maneuver

  73. Wilbur Carp

    Hey Goose, I told you I could stop on a dime.

  74. dodgeboys

    Can not see you, come closer……..TOO CLOSE!!!

  75. BoMoFo

    “You’re sideways! You’re sideways!” the pilot screamed until he realized it wasn’t the aircraft carrier that was in trouble…

  76. Jules

    Er…nice to meet you to…!?

  77. Crickette

    Any landing you can walk away from is a good landing…at least that’s what Sarge. told me.

  78. Anonymous

    check out switches on my new ride snoop dogg

  79. Stephen N.

    The polish navy’s stunning debut.

  80. John

    Take my breath away, Maverick…

  81. james h

    I don’t know why they started putting hood ornaments on these aircraft carriers.

  82. josh

    WHEN GOOD PLANES TURN BAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  83. Mike Hiribachi

    Before the complete fall of Siagon, the US military tried other tactics for getting refugees out of vietnam — they should have stuck with the helicopters.

  84. Lauren

    In an effort to improve morale, David Copperfield was on deck this past weekend performing a special show for the sailors aboard the USS Nimitz.

  85. tdbark

    F-16: 250,000,000 dollars. Aircraft Carrier: 2,000,000,000 dollars. Being able to land on the tip of your wing: Priceless!

  86. Anonymous


  87. Anonymous

    Can you hear me now?

  88. John Quatrini

    Can you hear me now?

  89. John Quatrini

    Can you hear me now?

  90. mugwump

    … see??…i told you she wasn’t wearing a bra !!!!

  91. rshef

    Don’t worry Mr. Drysdale. We wasn’t even close. You oughtta try drivin’ a tank around them skinny Beverly Hills roads.

  92. Some Yahoo!


  93. Dave

    Ensign, do I have something in my teeth?

  94. Len Patterson

    ‘No sweat pal. I learned this little cool as shit maneuver watching Will Smith blast aliens in the movie Independence Day”

  95. Quantum Mechanic

    Budget-crunched states borrow runway stripe painter from Navy.

  96. pipa

    that wasn’t there when i looked!!

  97. alan seaton

    Even the admiral agreed, Jim’s krazy glue pranks were getting way out of hand.

  98. LadyKea

    Pilot Jane Smith proves once again that women really ARE the better drivers.

  99. Dougy da Pizza guy

    Stan finally figured out what the litle blue button does

  100. BillyJoeBob

    Your air force recruiter would like to remind you, narcalepsy could be a setback.

  101. Reut

    Doesn’t matter what you say, I still think it’s a stupid statue..

  102. pilot

    this is NOT F-16
    it is F-14 tomcat !!!

  103. pilot

    this is NOT F-16
    it is F-14 tomcat !!!

  104. Capcom Freedom

    Hey, tell that control tower guy to come here! Oh, and tell him to bring his coffe and a white shirt.

  105. K

    Oh, crap!

  106. Dirk

    Yes, de pion ligt om!

  107. one_liner

    plane to tower requst fly-by shooting??

  108. dustin cobwebs

    well im not a pilot.. but I AM drunk!

  109. Richard Burton

    This is not an F-16 they belong to the airforce this is a navy plane making it an F-14 tomcat get it right

  110. decay

    Talk to me, Goose

  111. ray

    Attention tower, this is maverick requesting a flyby.

  112. Audiodoode

    Maybe swapping his oxygen with nitrous wasn’t such a fabulous idea.

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